


My Garbage Friend

by kosmosxipo



Category: Blaseball (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol, Canada Moist Talkers (Blaseball Team), Gen, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, blaseball - Freeform, make em up star trek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-27
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-18 17:03:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29737065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kosmosxipo/pseuds/kosmosxipo
Summary: Greer slipped and her secret is out. What will the person who knows do?
Relationships: Greer Lott and Eugenia Garbage
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8
Collections: Canada Moist Talkers Fanfiction





	My Garbage Friend

It was one laugh, one goddamn laugh, and Greer gave away everything. It was her own damn fault — the game was going well, Dot was pitching, York and CV and Fish were cleaning up at bat, and the umpires were keeping their shit to themselves. Things were nice, calm even. So when that piece of garbage sidled up to her and said, “Wow, CV blasted that one all the way to the Gregnar System,” Greer laughed and said-

Without stopping herself-

“Engines full ahead, Captain.”

Greer froze. The toothpick she had been chewing on dropped out of her mouth. She looked over at Eugenia, who was looking more slug like than human that day. She couldn’t see Eugenia’s eyes, but she could see her smile.

“Not a fucking word,” Greer said, but Eugenia was already scooting up to the on deck circle.

Greer turned on her heel and booked it for the locker room. Ziwa followed her in.

“Hey,” they called after Greer. “You good?”

“I’m leaving,” Greer said. She pulled off her jersey and threw it into her locker.

“What-“

“Dot has this, it’s the seventh, and there’s three other pitchers on the bench. I’m leaving.” She didn’t bother to put on another shirt, just pulled on her leather jacket and zipped it up.

“Greer, what’s happen-“

“Deuces,” Greer said, and didn’t look back at her confused captain.

——

For the next week, Greer didn’t say anything to Eugenia, and thankfully, Eugenia didn’t say anything to Greer. But she did give her looks. At one point during practice, when no one was looking, Eugenia made the hand sign that Captain May makes, _Be Good, And Be Good At It_. Greer pointed her glove at Eugenia, who only threw her head back and laughed, so loud that it echoed in the stadium. But she still didn’t say anything.

The trash, however, started to appear. 

It was nothing at first, just a trading card, a little worse for wear around the edges. Ensign N’cho, the kid of the show. And it was only later she found out how rare that card was. Then it was the insignia the crew wore, one of the replica models that was only available at Toronto ComicFest like twelve years ago. And then a signed picture of Captain May. Who would even throw that out?

Greer waited outside the stadium that night until she was sure everyone else was gone. When Eugenia came out, she closed in on her.

“You,” Greer said.

“Hi!” Eugenia said. She was in full girl mode, looking spunky and bubbly. Greer narrowed her eyes.

“Shut up.” She pulled a piece of paper from her pocket. “Thursday night, eight o’clock. Be there.” She shoved the paper into Eugenia’s head, where it hung like fruit in a jello mold. “Or not. I don’t care.”

Eugenia giggled. “You bet! See you then.”

“Ugh,” Greer said. She shoved her hands in her coat pockets and left.

——

The trick to keeping her teammates away from her apartment was to locate it in a part of Sunken Halifax furthest from land. The water buses still ran out there, but you really had to know which ones and how to find them.

Eugenia, of course, was punctual, as she was every Thursday, showing up a little before 8 so they could unpack the tacos she brought. Tonight she wore a Phlegm Fatales jersey. Greer didn’t question it because it either meant someone threw it out, or it was custom made. Either way, it was kind of a bummer.

At 8 o’clock, they sat on the couch, as far away from each other as they could. Eugenia spread out a tarp she brought with her to keep the couch clean. And, to Greer’s relief, Stellar Quest: Mission to the Stars began.

They didn’t talk, not a lot. Even during the commercials, one or the other usually went for more tacos, or another beer. Greer supplied those, not that she’d ever share her beer with anyone. Okay, maybe just not the good beer. But tonight, Eugenia laughed at a character on the screen, an engineer that started on the Stellar Jay with the new season.

“Oh my god, he’s totally a Faction spy,” Eugenia said.

“What?” Greer said. “No. They’d know.”

“He’s a spy, they’re supposed to trick people.”

“Yeah, but you don’t just trick Captain May. He’s not a chump like other Stellar Fleet officers.”

Eugenia took a drink of her beer, which swirled inside her until it absorbed into her body. “Yeah, I don’t know…”

“He’s too smart. And even if wasn’t, the rest of the crew would just eject the spy into space.” Greer felt the can in her hand crumple.

Eugenia got quiet. She watched Greer for a moment. Greer narrowed her eyes at her.

“Whatever it is, I don’t want to hear it.”

Eugenia looked back at the TV. “Look, he likes Trifold Salad. That’s totally a Faction thing.”

Greer didn’t say anything. She just stared at the TV. And then she got up and went to the bag of tacos on her kitchen counter. She opened the bag and stood there, silently fuming.

When she finally came back, Eugenia didn’t look at her. She set her empty beer bottle down on a side table. The scene ended, and they went to commercial. “Cat Atomic is coming in April,” she said, testing the waters.

“Oh what,” Greer said. “They haven’t been out here in a while.”

“I think the Gleek Area’s theater finally opened again.”

“Didn’t think they’d clean that up after The Flood.”

“They promise it’s ‘mostly dry’, so I think bands are coming back.”

Greer let out a curt laugh. “You gonna be in the pit?”

“Are you kidding me? I’d be obliterated instantly.” Eugenia laughed all the same. “Ziwa wants to go though.”

“Oh, yeah, how is fish partner?”

“She’s… she’s still swimming, you know? She-”

The commercial ended, and Greer waved at Eugenia to be quiet. The episode started to pick up. Lieutenant Fargo began to notice things were getting suspicious. Commander Ura agreed, and they began to put a plan into motion. Greer was rapt with attention, watching the crew of the Stellar Jay outwit traps and deceit and Death itself. That was the thing about the Stellar Jay — the were smart, they worked together, Death didn’t touch them because they wouldn’t let it. No one got left behind, no one put in harms way, not if Captain May could help it.

The episode ended on a cliffhanger, the spy holding May hostage in front of a helpless, stunned crew. Greer stood and walked away, her hands balled into fists. Eugenia heard her say under her breath, “This is not what I signed up for.”

Eugenia quietly cleaned up what mess there was in the kitchen, while Greer paced, mumbled about the episode. Eugenia put the leftovers in Greer’s fridge.

“You’re right,” Eugenia said. “May’s not an idiot. He’ll figure out something. No one’s going away, no one is going to be replaced. No one is going to die. Because May has this. Everyone will be back next week.”

Greer gave her a long side eye. “Yeah.”

Eugenia saw herself to the door, like she always did. She turned back, just in time to catch the dual gaze of Greer and her cardboard cutout both staring at her. Greer looked away. The cardboard looked embarrassed.

“Greer, you know that you can talk to me. There’s no shame in talking things out.”

Greer laughed, baring her teeth. “Yeah, there’s no shame in sucking the farts right out of my pants, either.”

Eugenia shook her head. She opened the door.

“Wait.”

Eugenia turned back.

Greer took a step forward. “You coming next week?”

“I told you I’d come back,” Eugenia said, offering Greer a soft smile. “I always come back.”

“Yeah, okay,” Greer said. “Oh, one more thing.”

Eugenia tilted her head. “What’s up?”

“If you ever tell anyone we do this, I will murder you.”

Eugenia laughed. “Yeah, you can’t even handle a TV show.” And she slammed the door behind her.

“HEY!” Greer shouted, muffled by the door.

——

Eugenia waited at the water bus stop. She smiled, taking a moment to fully appreciate the last hour. She wondered if she could convince Greer to go with them to see Cat Atomic, but doubted it. Still, she made a note to get three tickets all the same.

Her phone buzzed. Ziwa texted. “where r u”

“Had to take care of something. Omw home :)”

**Author's Note:**

> I very much like the idea that Greer can push everyone away except the very embodiment of her team’s values: Be Gross, Be Kind. Sometimes friendship is sitting awkwardly with someone for an hour to share the one thing you have in common. 
> 
> Shout out as always to Orb Corner. I hope I did credit to everyone’s favorite Blaseball monster.


End file.
